So, we haven't even hit the official start of summer yet, and a 5 month old has already been killed by being left in a hot car for FIVE hours.

I get that parents get busy and forget things...but your baby? And for five hours, at that? When I'm not with my kids, I'm thinking about them constantly. How is it that in 5 hours, you don't think of your baby and remember "Oh shit! I left my baby in the backseat!". And at that, how is it that no one noticed a baby in a carseat in a closed car? Not once in 5 hours...

These hot Georgia summers mixed with stupid parents tend to produce probably a dozen of these deaths a year. It's awful. I wonder if harsher punishments for these parents would remind them to check their backseats before they get out of the car....

Breastfeeding in public

Okay, so here in Atlanta, a woman is outraged that a community has banned public breastfeeding after the child is 2 years old. Two years old, as in...24 months. Yeah. Okay. She's convinced that if they're putting an age limit of two years on it, they'll continue to make it younger and younger until eventually, she is no longer able to breastfeed in public. This trips me out for about 12 different reasons.

First of all, this woman's baby is only 4 months old. Was she really planning to breastfeed until the kid is 2?! Teeth, honey. They have teeth by 2. Not to mention, how discreet do you think you can be with a two year old child hanging off your boob? I don't know...maybe you could carry around a quilt to drape over the kid.

Now personally, I am most certainly not opposed to breastfeeding. By all means, it's cheap, it's healthier for your baby, and it's beneficial to mom (Hey, burning an extra 500 calories a day? I'll take it!). But I never breastfed in public. I would make bottles before I left the house, and if I ran out, I would go to the bathroom. The whole throwing a blanket over the baby just didn't cut it for me. Come on--it's not any less obvious. And really, I don't think I'd want something draped over me and my food while I was trying to eat...but that's just me. Personally, I don't have a problem with moms who breastfeed in public AS LONG as they're not flaunting their boobs. There was this one night that I was in Walmart while I was pregnant with ZoeJane and this REALLY classy (notice how loosely I used that one?) woman comes down the same aisle as me with her 4 kids, one openly attached to her boob. By "openly attached", I mean, she had no bra on, her t-shirt was pulled up, the kid wasn't attached, and her boob was literally FLOPPING. It seriously tested my gag reflex.

So, I hate to burst any bubbles out there, but I think if I saw a woman nursing her two year old, it would have the same effect on me.

Some girls just don't know when to stop. They don't know when to give up. They don't know when to grow up and move on. And it's a sad thing that a grown woman would be so immature that she would endlessly pursue a high school boyfriend when it means tearing his family apart, as well as her own (well, what's left of it).

Some girls are in-escapable.

The Curse of the Kennedy Women

So, by now everyone has heard about the troubles brewing between Maria Shriver and the ex-governator of California. But tonight on the news, they mentioned something I thought was worth pondering. "The Curse of the Kennedy Women"....for those of you who don't know, Maria Shriver is a cousin of the Kennedy's or something along those lines, and of course, we all know about the infamous affairs carried on by the Kennedy men (i.e, Marilyn and JFK ring a bell?).

The situation between JFK, Jackie, and Marilyn is interesting to me. I mean, the whole country knew something was going on, do you really think that that poor woman was clueless? Hell no, she wasn't. There is a shit ton of evidence to suggest that Jackie knew all along, some even say that she had confronted Marilyn. And as much as I'd like to, I'd like to call Marilyn out for the homewrecker that she seemed to be. BUT, there's just about the same amount of evidence to suggest that not only was she severely mentally disturbed, but that JFK was quite the charmer. I can't help but wonder if he continuously led her on. But let's get back to Jackie.

Does the fact that she stayed with John Kennedy make her "a strong woman"? Does her staying demonstrate the ultimate commitment to marriage? Was she just trying to hold down the image? Keep things stable for her kids? Does it make her strong, committed, a good mother---or just stupid? I'm not sure I'm convinced either way.

So tomorrow, we'll hit 21 weeks and I'm already experiencing all the joys of pregnancy. Insomnia, check. Achy back, check. Hip pains, double check. Now...add onto that the fact that my 18 month old isn't sleeping for crap (c'mon dude, you were on such a roll!), and you've got one tired mama. On top of that, I'm trying desperately not to put on too much weight because I randomly gained so much right before I found out I was pregnant. I'm not trying to give myself an extra 50 lbs to lose once the baby is here. Now...please, someone explain to me how in the world to keep your weight the same while you're cooking a baby. Even better, how do you keep from gaining weight when you're too exhausted to move? Ha!

When I really have time to sit and think about it (which is all the time lately when you consider the amount of sleep that I'm not getting), it amazes me how insane my life has been in the last few years. It seems that it's gone from one extreme to another. There has been no constant. It's been hard to feel "safe" with things constantly changing, whether they're changed for the better or worse. There are still things that I look back on and I immediately feel sick. There are things I'm still coming to terms with, two years later. There are still about a million and two things on my list of things I need to let go of.

It also amazes me to think how much my little ones have grown. It seems like last week that I found out I was pregnant with ZoeJane, and here it is, a few months before she starts Pre-K.

Its scary to think how quickly our lives can change (and how quickly they WILL). All you can do is take comfort in knowing that right now...in this VERY moment, you're okay.

The Wichita Divide: The murder of Dr. George Tiller and the Battle Over Abortion.

Once I started getting interested on the topic of late term abortion, I googled books about George Tiller. I thought that as controversial as he was, surely there would be a book about him somewhere. The result I got was for The Wichita Divide. Unfortunately, I had to wait a few months for its release. Finally the day came and I bought my copy. It seemed like it took forever, but finally I received it and jumped right in.

First, let me say that I looked the author, Stephen Singular, up on facebook and added him just for shits and giggles (never in a million years thinking that 1, he even ran his own facebook page or 2, that if he did that he would ever confirm me as a friend). I was wrong. About 10 minutes later, I got a notice that he had confirmed me as a friend. Not long after that, he commented on the status I had posted about finally receiving my new book. I found this extremely gracious of him, and it made me even more anxious to read the book.

Now, as most of you know, the topic of late term abortion (particularly those done by George Tiller) has been of particular interest to me in the last year. I find his entire career fascinating for a number of reasons, and his untimely death devastating. But I had no idea how deep his political and legal issues ran.  I can only imagine what must have been going through his mind most of the time. Anyway, the book paints a graphic picture. Not only of George Tiller's murder, but of the obviously disturbed mind of Scott Roeder.

Don't get me wrong, I always knew that abortion (particularly late term abortion) was a hot button issues among the political heads...but I guess I didn't realize just how corrupt some of these people are when it comes to looking out for their own beliefs, regardless of laws and evidence.

Regardless of your beliefs on abortion, I think this is one worth reading. Even my conservative pro-life mother couldn't help but pick it up a few times the last time she was here to visit.

Sometimes it hits me just how much Dayton and I have been through in our (almost) 6 year marriage. It's almost scary to think about. Sometimes I wonder why I stuck around during some of the times that I did. And I'm sure he asks himself the same thing. It makes me wonder what kind of person I really am.

You would think that after so long, it would stop hurting. But I don't think it ever really goes away. I've always thought that a few months worth of damage can take twice as many years to fix...I guess I wasn't that far off.

It's a....

.....BABY!

No, really...So, Dayton and I went to the ultrasound and the baby is so low and so curled up, the tech decides she needs to do a vaginal ultrasound (Yay, me!...not). For a few minutes, I was sure that we wouldn't be able to find out the sex. The baby just did NOT want to move. But lo and behold, we caught a glimpse of the goodies. It's a BOY! Dayton and I both started laughing. I swear I almost fell off the ultrasound table. I would have bet money that this one was a girl. We were both so sure. But there it was...the unmistakable "turtle".

Lord help me. I'm going to need all the help I can get.

Last night I asked my mother if she would have let me get an abortion if I were raped and impregnated around 15 or 16 (if my body was physically capable of carrying a pregnancy, but I didn't want to carry it). She said she didn't know. She said if her  or 10 year old daughter was raped and impregnated it wouldn't be a question (as it would destroy her body)...but if her daughter were 15 or 16, while she could understand why she'd want one...she doesn't know if she'd allow it because she thinks it's "just wrong". Okay, her opinion. Got it.

But this is what baffles me: Before I was born, my mom got pregnant (she was 30-something), and started bleeding. By the time she got to the hospital, she was bleeding profusely. Ectopic. She had to have surgery right away. Problem: The baby was still alive. Of course, there is 0% chance of a baby surviving an ectopic pregnancy...and if left untreated, it can easily kill the mother too. Of course she had to terminate, have surgery, and have the bleeding stopped. I mean, geez, she had 3 of her own kids to think about, plus my dad's four from a previous marriage. It was a no brainer.

What I don't understand is how someone can so strongly oppose abortion, even in the most extreme cases. Rape, incest, ectopic, fetal abnormalities...especially when they've had one themselves for one of the same reasons.

Imaginary Miscarriage

Many people have stories of friends or acquaintances who have faked a pregnancy for one reason or another...and then (considering they're NOT pregnant), they kill off their imaginary babies in a "miscarriage". In my 24 years, I've come across a few of these girls. I've always found it slightly amusing and a little pathetic, all at the same time. Now that I am a mother, and know so many women who have actually HAD miscarriages, I find it offensive.

The oddest of all, is when a women who already HAS a child pulls this stunt. I knew one. And she achieved her overall goal : Get the guy. They were divorced a year later. Another interesting thing to consider is the girls who actually get so wrapped up in playing the devastated "mother", they actually start to feel as if they've really experienced a loss. Uh, therapy anyone?

Women do it for all sorts of reasons. But usually, it's in order to keep a guy (because we all know that men these days will automatically stay with you and turn into your knight in shining armor if he knocks you up). I find this appalling. Is there really a man, SO worth your time, that he is worth mocking a real woman's pain? I mean, really?

God forbid these women actually get pregnant and lose a child.

Victory!!!

Almost 10 years ago, we watched in horror as our country was attacked. We watched towers burn, people jumping, and a whole city come to a stand still. Our country came together on September 11, 2001 to mourn.  Tonight, we come together again to celebrate. Osama Bin Laden is dead. The man who single handedly brought a nation to its knees has been killed. We have his body, along with DNA confirmation.

Apparently he was killed inside a mansion in Pakistan. At this point, we are unsure of how he was killed. The United States has his body, DNA from his sister's brain tissue has confirmed that it is in fact, the sorry bastard we've been hunting.

May God have mercy on his soul, if he even has one...